Dear R,

I hope this finds you well.

I really miss the friendship I thought we had, but as it turns out, you’re an actual piece of human trash. Almost half my life you had me fooled, and losing you was the hardest and most rewarding thing I ever went through. I wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire, unless it was one of those weak wees where I could pretend I was making effort to help, but really doing nothing. You know, like you always did.

Good riddance.

Fuck all the way off forever,